Hey Jess! I was wondering if you could help figure out how to stop feeling beneath others. I feel like the popular people, or attractive people are better than me and I shouldn’t be able to do what I want because I will be made fun of. I need to boost my self-confidence because a lot of the time I feel worthless and weird. Please help. Thanks. -Amanda, 16

Dear Amanda,

I’m so sorry you’re not feeling confident! We all have times when we feel insecure but don’t let those insecurities keep you from enjoying every minute of your life! This time in your life can be amazing because we learn and discover so much about ourselves! You’re really becoming an individual, learning what kind of person you are and what kind of person you want to become.

There is and will ALWAYS be people that enjoying bringing others down, it’s crucial you learn this now. Why are you concerned with what they think? They have just as many issues as everyone else, so what gives them the right to judge anyone? The voice you have to focus on is your own – it sounds to me like you are keeping yourself back from living life because you are choosing to feel worthless and weird. No one can make you feel anything you don’t want to feel!

Start by taking a close look at your peers. Each is unique but ALL of them are going through their own struggles and awkward situations that high school creates. No one is perfect; all the popular and attractive girls are just as insecure as everyone else! That’s why they pick on others, to distract everyone from concentrating on them. Then take a close look at yourself, inside and out. Why not go out and experience what you want to do? Don’t let anyone keep you from being you. Pick out a few inside qualities you really love about yourself, like your sense of humor, optimism or charm. Then pick a few physical qualities, your great hair, legs, anything! Then remind yourself everyday about all of those things you love about yourself and that you are just as important and worthwhile as anyone else! Keep reminding yourself and slowly you will begin breaking down those insecurities and loving and appreciating how wonderful you really are!

Blessings from Team Jess